Playing The Victim
// May 4th, 2010 // 1 Comment » // My Life, My Thoughts
Lets face it… all of us are whiners sometimes… everybody is to some extent given some grace when they complain about how things are going for them… in fact, its better to be honest about your feelings that to pretend that everything is going fine. I spent years whining about my divorce and how bad it was… and how much I was paying for it… call it the stages of grief or whatever you want… at some point everyone gets tired of you playing the victim. There is some kind of dysfunctional human mechanism that feeds on attention and sympathy and it can really sabotage our lives! Constantly playing the victim wears on friendships and sometimes exhausts them completely… There has to be some point when you recognize the problem for what it is… Your perspective is skewed! If your life is constantly a train-wreck then you should be taking a look at what is going on.
If you are in debt up to your eyeballs then get drastic… get rid of credit cars…get a much smaller house… or sell a car… get rid of your “stuff” live more simply… Last Christmas I can’t count how many people were complaining about how they couldn’t afford Christmas gifts… but almost without exception each of them bought a 40″ or larger flat panel TV… sorry but I do not understand the logic there! No wonder you are miserable!
I see so many people walking around complaining about health problems… yet the single solitary thing that they should do they simply ignore…. eating unhealthy, living lives filled with stress… drinking alcohol… popping prescription drugs like candy…smoking…
One simple word…. QUIT! just quit quit quit! I am sorry but it is just that easy… if you are fat because you over eat… quit! your life will be better for it… if your job is stressful figure out a way to do something different! God gave us free will for a reason… we can choose to make a difference in our lives…
and if you think I should practice what I preach… here is what I have done in the last few years..
- I was suffering from anxiety attacks and decided to quit a stressful job and found a new one… and accepted a cut in pay and benefits including a company vehicle to reduce my stress
- I realized that I was very unhealthy and began eating healthier and smaller portions… consequently I lost 60 lbs, and several health problems completely went away!
- I realized that being in debt was making me miserable and frustrated so we decided to rent the cheapest apartment we could find so that we could get out of debt. and we are only 4000 away from being debt free (waiting on the income tax check)
- I realized many things that I never had time to do was because I was addicted to video games … so I sold my Xbox 360 and now I spend lots more time with my family
- I realized that my relationship with my wife had become strained so I decided to be more responsible and helpful… things are much more on track now.
The point I am trying to make is that the sum total of your life is affected by the actions you take on a daily basis… the bible says… “do not be deceived, God is not mocked whatever a man sows that he shall reap” Gal 6:7 if you continue to wallow in self pity you will end up years from now wondering where your friends have gone… and why you feel so abandoned…when the reality is that you abandoned yourself a long time ago… Take hold of your life and live it to the fullest… Make bold and righteous choices… live radically and do something about your problems… exhaust all options, find your joy in simplicity and wholesome-ness step away from the world that you have created for yourself and ask yourself… what are these things adding to my life…if the answer is nothing… well then you know what to do… whatever you decide… stop playing the victim…
Tags: debt, depression, Faith, life, stress, struggle, victim mentality
