Diary of a Dead Beat Dad – Angry

Son

I am angry… your mom called and informed me that she contacted a lawyer to take my parental rights… I am so tired of constantly being beat on by this woman. I am also tired of trying to figure out what her angle is on everything… and trust me she always has an angle… about the time that you think things might be going ok… she is setting you up for a whole new world of pain… and you just walk right into the trap… well apparently she is convinced that she has enough damning evidence against me to take you away… the divorce papers were hardly filed away when she started on the whole “just sign him over!” campaign… like you are a car or something…

This month has been truly great… she turned off your phone. so now every phone call must go through her… not that it makes much difference… I get voicemail.. and no return call.. so now Yay I get to call her… and try to talk to you… I guess it is a simpler way to make sure that I do not talk to you… for long enough to justify a judge taking my parental rights… like I said… there is always an angle…

she will call her daddy or convince some poor soul to donate to a “Worthy” cause or just fall down in a grocery store somewhere and sue them, to finance her new challenge. and I will scrape the money together to go to court again!!!

I can only pray that somone at some point sees through her expert smokescreen and sees her for who she really is. At this point I often feel like people think I am making things up… heck… sometimes she convinces ME… that I had it all wrong… then I remember… oh wait…its just the chinese water torture coming back to haunt me.

I think the hardest thing to come to terms with … is that no matter the effort that I put out she always makes sure that it counts for nothing in your eyes.

I went back and read a few emails exchanged… and it’s as if she knows what buttons to push to get the desired results… who knows she could have been setting this up for 5 years! calculating and ploting… I might have walked right into the trap and never known…

I actually purposely chose not to “keep an account” of what she did just because it feels so.. unforgiving…how can I mark down somone’s transgressions if Jesus wiped mine away!?

God has never failed me and will not fail me now. Regardless of the decision in court God will ultimately be glorified… in all of this.. and I await that day with strong desire and a great anticipation!